when defensive emotions overwhelm logical thought during a discussion or argument with your partner. Think of a fight, flight, or freeze response. Typically the best approach is to take a time away - to self-soothe and recall times your partner was at their best, or come back after a 40 min break. Let your partner know that even though you need some time, you do care about them, and will be back.
https://www.gottman.com/blog/making-sure-emotional-flooding-doesnt-capsize-your-relationship
6 min video : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1G3uhea3MgI
keywords - defensiveness, arguments,